Well, that's quite the uplifting blog title, I know, but this was a quote that was doing the rounds on the internet last week or so and it struck a chord with me. I guess I identified with it, and it kinda made me sad because it's true.
Don't get me wrong, I am lucky enough to have different friendship groups dotted around the UK and we come together for fun times (...they're all getting married, it's an epidemic), to try and pretend our nights out won't end up with a three day hangover and, most importantly, when it matters. I have best friends from school and best friends from uni but strangely, not that many where I actually live in Cardiff (here's a nod to you though, Marty, Tors and Scott). I fear I have fallen prey to the curse of moving for work - it is HARD to make friends as an adult and to keep hold of previously made friends in the process of moving away and growing up.
Those friends you shared every crush with at 13, that you argued with in PE at 15 and got drunk with at 17 and now don't speak to? I guess that's for a reason. We all grow and change and become real people - not saying that little me at 15 learning the Backstreet Boys dance routines wasn't 'real' but compared to my 60hr week in the TV industry, I would say life's a little different and my perspective has changed somewhat! (Can still do a killer BSB dance move though.) But that's where we all have something in common. We're not teenagers - fuck, some of us aren't even twenty-somethings anymore - and we all have so many preoccupations that you can't fit everybody in to your life so you keep the ones that you think are the best ones, and that's okay!
EXCEPT now there's a void where once your life was full of these friendtypeople along with your best friends, and, now it is not...as people couple up and get married, as people focus on their careers and/or children, it is a fact of life that it gets harder to maintain these friendships. Add that to moving somewhere for work and it's got WOMAN DIES WITH ONLY CATS FOR COMPANY written all over it. (Dramatic. I know.)
I do think that quality outweighs quantity and this is what is most important. You get to be pickier as a grown up and that includes losing people from your life and being lost from someone else's... but the lives that you are in and that are in yours from say, age 14, 18 and 24, and in all your years of antics and awful glory you still want to hang? Those are the ones to hold on to, so don't fall back on the apathy of being an adult, it's no excuse. Text, call, email, write. Just be there and they will be there for you...to save you from all the cats.
Riley x
Don't get me wrong, I am lucky enough to have different friendship groups dotted around the UK and we come together for fun times (...they're all getting married, it's an epidemic), to try and pretend our nights out won't end up with a three day hangover and, most importantly, when it matters. I have best friends from school and best friends from uni but strangely, not that many where I actually live in Cardiff (here's a nod to you though, Marty, Tors and Scott). I fear I have fallen prey to the curse of moving for work - it is HARD to make friends as an adult and to keep hold of previously made friends in the process of moving away and growing up.
Those friends you shared every crush with at 13, that you argued with in PE at 15 and got drunk with at 17 and now don't speak to? I guess that's for a reason. We all grow and change and become real people - not saying that little me at 15 learning the Backstreet Boys dance routines wasn't 'real' but compared to my 60hr week in the TV industry, I would say life's a little different and my perspective has changed somewhat! (Can still do a killer BSB dance move though.) But that's where we all have something in common. We're not teenagers - fuck, some of us aren't even twenty-somethings anymore - and we all have so many preoccupations that you can't fit everybody in to your life so you keep the ones that you think are the best ones, and that's okay!
EXCEPT now there's a void where once your life was full of these friendtypeople along with your best friends, and, now it is not...as people couple up and get married, as people focus on their careers and/or children, it is a fact of life that it gets harder to maintain these friendships. Add that to moving somewhere for work and it's got WOMAN DIES WITH ONLY CATS FOR COMPANY written all over it. (Dramatic. I know.)
I do think that quality outweighs quantity and this is what is most important. You get to be pickier as a grown up and that includes losing people from your life and being lost from someone else's... but the lives that you are in and that are in yours from say, age 14, 18 and 24, and in all your years of antics and awful glory you still want to hang? Those are the ones to hold on to, so don't fall back on the apathy of being an adult, it's no excuse. Text, call, email, write. Just be there and they will be there for you...to save you from all the cats.
Riley x
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